Saturday, December 31, 2011

Tri: I Suck At Biking

What I had on schedule for yesterday:

B 30 (include 5 x 1:00 out of the saddle in top gear, 2:00 recovery spin

What I thought I had on schedule for yesterday:

B 20 (include 5 x 1:00 out of the saddle in top gear, 2:00 recovery spin

Um. Yeah.

I still did the important part. And then showered, put on my pajamas, ate some food, and went to gray out the day on my training plan. And saw my mistake. And I wasn't about to hop on the bike again to add on ten junk minutes. Three days into my training plan and I already messed up. Ha ha ha ha ha.

You can see the out of the saddle bits in my heart rate.

It was weird to see my heart rate so long compared to my two runs with the heart rate monitor. I read something on the internet about how that's normal for runners who cycle.

The intervals were fucking HARD. My quads are giant pussies. They burned so bad. I straight up whimpered on the 5th one. Jeez. Gunna have to whip those puppies into shape. My legs were quivering when I got off the bike, and I was wiped out for the rest of the night.


The bike shorts were not the best for butt pictures. Will these awesome new bikinis make up for it?


$20 mystery suit, aka disco ball suit.


My mom left town this afternoon, so on her way out we took her to the M Cafe. It's right next to the Biggest Loser Resort at Fitness Ridge. I didn't see anyone recognizable, but I had a lot of fun.

(according to my sister-in-law, an episode of Millionaire Matchmaker was filmed here, too)

My niece ate billiard chalk.


Today I have a run, then I'm getting slutted up and going to some random club to dance until I cripple myself, drink until I want to go to sleep, and take the train home while freezing my ass off. It's going to be AWESOME!

Realistically, I'll be out with my favorite people. We could sit on the beach with box wine and have a great time, so I'm sure it will be a blast, no matter what happens.

Goodbye 2011. You were a good year. I hope that next year I continue to be awesome, and continue to have this much fun.

Friday, December 30, 2011

Tri: Deadlift PB and Swiiiiiiiiiiiiiimming

On yesterday's schedule:

-training session
-pool time

The Workout

10 deadlifts
10 goblet squats with a curl at the bottom

(break to test single DL lifts at higher weights)

20 reverse lunges with curls at the top
12 shoulder presses
20 20" step ups

20 side lunges with shoulder presses at the top
15 push ups

The End.


I drove straight from the training session to the pool. I did not see any Kardashians.

My pool homework:

100m easy
100m hard (2:10)
10 minutes easy
100m hard (2:03)
100m easy

It was an asskicker. Mostly because my shoulders were tired as shit from my workout. But, hey, for this tri, the swim comes at the end, so I need to get better swimming tired.

After yesterday's bitchfest about my stupid goggles, I was pissed to find I forgot to grad a different pair. I sweat they fucking bruised my eyes last night.

Fuckers. As soon as I was done I dropped them in the fucking trash. As soon as I got home I grabbed the FOUR pairs I had in my exercise box, and threw them in my swim bag. Never again.

Here is a picture of my swimjama ass.


Once I got home I ate leftover Indian food.

And then I ate this.

What is that you say?

Chocolate caramel marshmallow bacon pie, made by a friend.

And then I was in bed by 9pm.

Thursday, December 29, 2011

Triathlon Training Begins!

On schedule for yesterday:

35 minute run, 25 minute swim, easy.

I opted to run before I swam. The idea of running with wet hair sounded less and less appealing as the day cooled down.

I'm sure I'll quit posting these Garmin stats at some point, but for now I find them pretty interesting. Deal with it.

I decided that "easy" for the run was going to mean trying to keep my heart rate around 175. I'm mostly making that up. Kat, at Pedal Faster gave me awesome instructions to figure out my target heart rate and stuff, but I haven't done it yet. So, 175 it was. And that worked out pretty well. Sometimes I felt like I was running too slow, and sometimes I felt like I was running too fast, but I ignored my speed and just focused on my heart rate, and it seemed to turn out fine.

After the run I was all set to head to my pool, which is only 2 miles away. But, it dawned on me that it was winter break at the school where the pool is. So, in my bathing suit, I sat on my lap top, suspicion confirmed. Fuck. So I started emailing my tri coach, explaining why I wouldn't be swimming last night. And, man, I felt like a wussy shit heel for writing that email. I mean, I was already in my fucking bathing suit, and I couldn't be bothered to try to find another pool? So, I looked. All the city pools in the Valley were seasonal except my pool. So, that was out. But, what about private pools? So, I found a Swim Club in Calabasas. And I started to email my trainer that while I wasn't going to swim tonight, I'd be able to swim there tomorrow. But I still felt like a pussy. I mean, it was only 9 miles away. Traffic was totally clear. What was my problem?

So, I discarded the email, threw on my shoes, and went to swim.

These are my swimjamas. I can slip into them soaking wet without a problem. They're warm. They're shitty, so I don't care if I get chlorine all over them. And, damn I look sexy.

But not as sexy as I look after 25 minutes of wearing the worst fucking goggles ever. So, I have a box of "workout crap" in our guest room. And for some reason I have like 5 pairs of goggles. So I grabbed a pair from the box. Huh. Never seen this pair before. I'll wear them anyway. My fucking face hurt the whole goddamn swim, and those pieces of shit leaked half the time anyway. My hopes of picking up 12 year old lifeguards post-swim were shattered. Life is hard. Never wearing those stupid goggles again. I mean, all goggles make me look like I'm 60, but this was bad.

Beyond the superficial, the swim was fine. I haven't swam since my tri in September, but I didn't forget how. For a few laps I futzed with trying to breathe on my left side. For a few laps I futzed with trying to breathe every four strokes. I focused on my head position. But, mostly I spaced out and enjoyed the warm water. The pool was huge, but there were only two other people there. Everything was super nice. The only downside was the pool was outdoors, which meant a short COLD walk from the pool back to the locker room. The upside is, it's pretty near where I train, so heading over there for a short swim tonight after working out will be awesome.

I'm glad I was able to nut up and get my scheduled training done last night. Otherwise it would have been a terrible way to kick off this training stretch.

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Kettlebells and Triathlon Training

Today my triathlon training starts up again. I signed up for another tri in March. Balls deep.

Technically, I got my training plan yesterday, and the first thing on it was yesterday's strength training session, but I would have done that anyway, so it doesn't count.

It was a good session. I notice I sweat less in the winter. It was between 62 and 64F in the garage. I always start in a hoodie and end in my tshirt.

My arms felt like they were going to fall off on the drive home. SO TIRED. Tired, tired arms. It's a good feeling, though, to have them feel that heavy and worn. It means I worked hard.

The Workout

20 kb swings
30 seconds rest

3 turkish get ups per side
10 squat and sauks (?) press

12 incline rows (two 25lb dbs for the first set, then up to 30lbs)
15 squat and press

10 kbs swings
10 goblet squats
5 cleans per arm

The End.

Okay, let's talk about cleans. More importantly, let's talk about my complete inability to do cleans from a swing. I can do stationary cleans. No issue there. One fluid motion. No bruising. But, when I'm coming from a swing, I cannot, for the life of me, get that damn bell to come straight up. Instead it arcs out, which means I have to pull it back, which means it thumps rudely against my forearm. I know, in my brain of brains, what I am supposed to do. I understand the physics of it. I just can't get it to translate to action.

The most frustrating part is, I've done them in the past. I'm almost certainly overthinking this.It's so, so frustrating.

But, I still walked away feeling good.


There was frost on the ground this morning. I am NOT looking forward to swimming in the cold, so I'm hoping the day lights up with warmth like it has in the past. Winter is the worst time for swimming. I think I need to invest in some giant sweat suit to throw on post-pool.

I'm also debating if it makes more sense to run first, rinse off at the pool, then swim, or swim first, and run with damp hair. I guess we'll see how cold it is and how lame I am. We'll see.


For the final night of Hanukkah: Candlebots, transform and light up!

Unofficial 10k PR and Christmas Recap

Back in October I set a 10k PR: 51:52

Flash forward to Christmas. My husband bought me a Garmin.

Yesterday I charged it up and threw it on.

It even comes with a heart rate monitor. The scary face is all mine, though. Also, I know dick about heart rate. I should probably look that up or something.

Originally I was aiming for about three miles. I was waiting for my dad to show up, so I kept running loops in my neighborhood (side note: My "mile loop" is apparently about 0.94 miles, which explains a lot about previous runs). But, every time I jogged by my house my dad was there yet, and I felt pretty good. So I kept going. And then I hit five miles. And that's so close to 6.2 miles, it would be stupid not to keep going.


At the tail end of mile two, my shoulder started hurting. This is a problem I used to have a lot while running. I went to a physical therapist for it last year at some point. He thought it was a combination of poor posture and tension.

I have terrible posture. But, tension? Here's the thing. I got a fancy pant massage yesterday. All my tension should have been on the last train to Clarksdale. Anyway, I slowed down my pace to work out whatever my shoulder issue was. And then I'd speed up, and then my shoulder would flare up, and then I'd slow down. But, looking at my chart, there wasn't much of a dramatic change in pace. Until that last awesome, delicious mile.

The best part about the run was, I could have kept going. I would have slowed down a bit, but I could have kept going. Which is good. I don't think I've ran this far since Halloween. It's nice to know I haven't lost everything, distance-wise. And I'm pleased as punch about the time. I spent most of my running career in the safe zone of 10 minute miles or slower (look at my marathon and half marathon PRs, for example). I just didn't push myself at all, because it seemed difficult.

So, I'm looking forward to some pushing.



We made cookies.

That looked like crime scene photos.

My brother Harv tormented the dog.

There was a spoon balancing contest (everyone lost).

The neighborhood lights were pretty cool.

It's not Christmas morning without Farm John's sausages and my mom's apricot rolls. I found myself at Ralph's on Christmas morning, buying 8 packages of sausage. Totally worth it.


My brother bought his kids a giant trampoline. I enjoyed it.


It was a great holiday. I love spending time with all my brothers, all at once. I wish we all lived closer so it could happen more often.


12/24/11: Rorschach's journal. December 24th, 2011: The candles are lit again. Fifth time this week. Must investigate further. Hurm.

12/25/11: I'm not left candled either.

12/26/11: This town deserves a better class of candle. And I'm gonna give it to 'em.

Saturday, December 24, 2011

Meiri Christmas Eve!

Reasons Why Yesterday's Run Sucked

-Even though it was only 3.1 miles it sucked the whole time and felt like it took forever.
-My lungs hurt from the get-go.
-I felt like I kept getting slower and slower.
-Every block felt more difficult.
-I didn't enjoy any part of it.
-My ankles were sweating too much.
-I spent the whole run wondering when I started sucking so bad at running and how out of shape I must be and how I hate having shitty runs, and this was just a shitty, shitty run.

Reason's Why Yesterday's Run Didn't Suck As Bad As I Thought

-Negative splits (8:31, 7:58, 7:42)
-Apparently being fast in general
-Lungs burning = lungs learning to suck less, right?

So, to humblebrag, my run felt like it sucked because I was running faster than usual. And maybe I should warm up before a run if I'm going to feel all butt hurt about my pace, since, hey, looking at my splits, it takes me a little bit to warm up. I'm coming from a background where I didn't get a shit how fast I ran. But now I kind of care. So, I need to nut up and work on it, or drop back down to not giving a shit.

I want to get faster, see, but I don't always enjoy running hard, and I don't want to put in the work. *sad laughter* Clearly I am going places in the world.

Anyway, the run wasn't the shit pile of shit that I thought it was.

Oh, I got an iFitness belt in the mail today that I won through Rad Runner. I tried it out. And, I'll try it out some more before I make up my mind.


Last night was my best friend Marla's birthday, so we got cleaned up again.

It was an evening of listening to people talk about crossfit.


It's Christmas Eve, so here are some ornaments.

Bumbles bounce!

An ornament we're going to have to start hiding in a few years.

This is a mouse trap. We acquired this during SantaCon one or two years ago.

My mom bought us this ornament the first year my husband and I lived together.


If you don't like rotting possum carcasses, you may want to scroll down quickly to the cat picture below.

Yesterday my mom and I were puttering in my front garden, which was majorly overgrown. And we found a possum carcass.

A little background: I grew up in the mountains. I've had an outhouse. I've lived with no electricity. I remember my dad stashing a deer carcass in my tree house after he went hunting. I have a little bit of hill people in me. So when my mom suggested I tear the head off and stash it somewhere to finish decomposing, so I could have a neat skull, I jumped on it.

Yup. Judge away. If I get rabies it's my own damn fault.


I like my cat best when she hears a weird noise and sits up on her hind legs to investigate. I want to put a top hat on her.


Last night's picture: Oh boy, candles!


Meiri Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, and/or whatever other crap you celebrate.