Yesterday, as part of my lunch, I ate like 6 servings of raw green beans.
In case, for some unknown reason, you use me as a role model: DO NOT DO THIS.
Especially not hours before you're going to lift heavy things.
So, most of what we talked about during the session was how I was going to vomit warm green beans everywhere, or try to fart and shit my pants. The whole session. We are *those* people in the gym.
Anyway.
The Workout:
4x (no rest)
60 second rowing machine
30 second giant ropes
20 kettlebell swings
10 TRX pull ups
4x
12 tricep pull downs
12 barbell curls (10lb heavier than my trainer wanted, because he couldn't find the right barbell, and I'm a fucking bad ass)
4x
12 bicep curls on this weird archaic looking machine.
12 straight bar pull downs
3x
60 second planks
--------------
And then I farted in my car all the way home. Not enough, though. My stomach hurt ALL night. It finally feels okay this morning.
Moral of this story: Do not eat a day's worth of fiber in one sitting.
--------------
Never has a picture of my ass been more relevant.
I really need to stop wearing black to the gym. It's killing my pit stain pictures.
We're going to pretend I take these pictures while the car is fully stopped, okay?
I cannot wait to grow out these retarded fucking bangs. They are killing me.
-----------
Today I have 25 minutes of running on schedule. (I'm trying to ration out my use of the word "docket" so I don't get sick of it)
I'm taking it to the HILLS, people. Hitting up my best friend, Victory Trails.
I almost got my trainer to come with me, but he has a session afterward, and wouldn't have time to shower. I told him *I* would mind if he rolled up on my session all sweaty and flushed. Okay, I didn't actually tell him that, but I would have, if I had thought of it then. I've definitely said worse things to him.
---------
Tell me about your favorite place to run, ever.
Yeah, high fiber foods are like, not helpful whatsoever.
ReplyDeleteHoly shit this made me laugh.
As for my favorite place to run, I'm living the dream in Monterey, CA. Beats the shit out of hot and steamy Virginia.
Ha! I use to go to the gym after work and eating high fiber foods all day made my tummy "iffy" at the gym. I would be running along and feel like I had to fart so when no one was around, I let it fly. To only have someone walk past my treadmill when the stench was still hangin around.
ReplyDeleteYou rock!
My favorite place to run is Tribble Mill Park near my hometown. It was where I first started to run with my cross country team and I've loved it ever since. There are several trails so I can pick according to my difficulty/length for that day. Love it!
ReplyDeleteHAHAHA! Thanks for the comment on my blog about the reflective vests! That's so f'ing funny. Don't forget the headlamp!! :)
ReplyDeleteSo, the whole sweaty armpits and dark shirts! A couple months ago I went to the gym to run in my favorite grey Philadelphia Eagles t-shirt right? Ran 6 miles, got off the treadmill, took one look at the globe sized rings under my arms and rushed to the car. What was I thinking?? It was pretty funny. Go Eagles! HAHAHA!
Nice work on the BB curls!
ReplyDeleteNot so nice work on the beans :-/
My phrase of the year has been "as per usual". I say it ALL THE TIME! So I embrace your use of "docket".
ReplyDeleteI hate growing out bangs.
This is so corny, but my favorite place that I ever ran was through the Magic Kingdom during my first half marathon. I guess 'cause it was so fun with all the stuff to see and characters and people cheering. I need to always have my training runs lined with supportive spectators, happy music and short people in big furry costumes!
I'm not into furries, fyi. That freaks me the eff out!!
Did you ever hear that ryhme when you were little? Started with,
ReplyDelete"Beans, beans, the magical fruit..". Bahahaha. I was signing it to myself throughout this entire post.
What are you talking about "when you were little", Stefanie?? I still say it ALL THE TIME! ;)
ReplyDeleteLOL did your car still smell like farts the next time you got in it? That's happened to me before. Yeah, my ass is THAT rank.
ReplyDeleteHow is it that I'm the only dude commenting on a fart post . . .
ReplyDelete1. AHHHH HA HA HA
ReplyDelete2. I totally battled this yesterday, and a lil today, I am amping up on total bliss for my body and healthyness before SFM this weekend, but it stinks (literally?)
3. I want your arms
4. Good luck with the hair, I have no patience:)
5. Im still trying to run with you when it all mellows out, we can still do this right???